1/2 cn Spam
-sliced into 4 slabs
3    Slices "Beefsteak" Rye
1 ts Vidalia Onion Mustard
1 ts Horseradish
1 tb "Miracle Whip"
1/4 c  Cole slaw
4    Lettuce leaves
1    Thick slice of tomato
2    Dill pickle spears
-quartered
1    Slab of Sharp Cheddar
2    Thick slices Bermuda Onion
1    (2 liter) Coke(tm)

-OPTIONAL EQUIPMENT –
Plate
Napkin
Glass
NFL Sunday game
-or- WWF match

Assemble all components, slice in two if desired, chow down

NOTE: Recipe from confirmed bachelor, currently training for other uses.